HELP! I Can’t Let Go……

let go1

When I asked for help…

Or Rhema from my hair change!

I didn’t want to discourage the brothers from reading this post, so I chose a better ‘accommodating’ title, as stated above.

When I was leaving the UK, it was hard carrying all my belongings that I had acquired throughout my stay. The baggage allowance of the flight was limited. So I had to give some things away to charity and friends. But there were two sets of hair moisturizing conditioners, which I vehemently refused to leave behind. They were 1 liter each. The truth is, there was no space for these conditioners, but I was not having it; they had to come with me. I loved this conditioner because it had this stingy, menthol like feeling when I applied it to my head; and I love that feeling.

Months after, I realize that my hair has changed. It is thicker. I guess it is as a result of reducing the number of times I retouch [to apply hair relaxer to new growth, in order for them to be straight] my hair in a year. But this change, has brought new responsibilities as well. I also noticed that, it was not retouching properly every time I retouched, it was frizzy etc. The truth is I was not enjoying my hair anymore, I was always in a rush to put a weave on or braid it.

Just last week, I asked for help on Instagram, and suggestions were made. One of the suggestions that was made was for a proper check of the products I was using- that stood out for me, because I was sure it had nothing to do with my diet, and my hair technique is good [Well, I try]. So two days ago, I knew it was time to wash my hair, and I was just thinking of what to do; and bam! The word ‘Argan oil’ came to mind [Holy Spirit at work]. I have seen videos and read blogs of hair gurus talk about oils that they use- coconut oil, emu oil etc, but not recently. So I looked up ‘Argan oil’ and its benefit, and one of the main things that Argan oil does, is that it eliminates frizz, which was the main challenge with my hair.

I went to a mall close to my house to look for products with Argan oil and just the oil itself. I got to the hair shop, and checked the price of just the oil; and it was ridiculously expensive, considering that I wanted to buy the oil, shampoo, leave-in-conditioner and conditioner. So I went to another mall quite a distance from home, which I had in mind initially; and I was able to buy everything and even a wide toothed comb.

I did an overnight oil deep conditioning, washed and conditioned my hair; and I can gladly say that, my hair feels different. Whenever I washed my hair, I could not comb it when it was damp without removing my scalp [not literally], but yesterday, I combed through it while it was damp and while I dried it. All these were near impossible before now. I am not saying my hair is perfect, all of a sudden. I am saying- the healing process has began….

Why did you have to read my hair tale?

I always feel I know better. NEWS FLASH- God knows best!

Letting go of something we have become accustomed to, is very hard. We believe we know what’s good for us. That is quite true. We know what’s good, not what’s the best. How do you react when God tells you to let go of something? Let go of that job, that sweet sin, that grudge, that relationship, that friend, that environment etc.

Just like that flight and every other flight, our lives have baggage allowance/restrictions

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such great a cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Hebrews 12 v 1 [NIV]

Letting go feels like a punishment, but it is a blessing. When we stood before God and the congregation, proclaiming that God is our Lord and Savior, I believe we meant it. God, being our Lord means giving Him the authority to dictate what stays and what goes. If you are still in control of your life, then you have not come into the Lordship of God.

Source- Google!

Source- Google!

If there is anything I have come to understand about God, it is the fact that- God won’t change your choice. He can give you opportunities, nudge you with signs, but He won’t make a choice for you.

For every sin we commit and for everything we do, the choice is ours. And for every time, God tells us to let go of a thing or person, it is a prompt for growth. When you read about the life of Abraham, Ruth, Jephthah, Joseph, Moses etc, when God needed to do some serious work with them and in them, He took them away from their familiar; and this required letting go of family, country etc. The truth is they did not let go without feeling the pain. There was pain for them, there will be pain for you, but the glory that will follow will wipe off the pain.

When I was having this challenge with my hair, every other person did not know there was a challenge. People would leave nice compliments about the hair, but they did not know there was a struggle. This is because there was growth, the hair was growing, but I knew there was a thorn. It was not growing as it should have been because of what I was using- the conditioner.

It is possible that people cannot see that sin, you are battling with. All they see, is your smile, your joviality and they say; Oh, this sister/brother is such a true child of God. But you know that hidden sin you are struggling with, they don’t know about. Well! It is time to let it go.

While I kept using that conditioner, my hair still grew. I remember a lady at one point told me to be careful with the conditioner as it may have side effects from that stingy effect, but I paid no heed to her. I loved the feeling, but the feeling was a façade. It was bound to clear away and reality set in. So it’s possible that a person can be ‘flourishing’ while he/she has not let go of whatever it may be that God has asked him/her to let go- that’s God’s grace. But remember Romans 6 v 1-2…

What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? [NIV]

We cannot abuse the grace of God. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13 v 11…

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me [NIV]

We know better to do better; not remain stagnant.

In letting go/coming out/setting yourself apart, you do not go on this journey alone. The Holy Spirit helps you. When I decided to get the products for the hair, the first shop I went to, was not what I had in mind. The Holy Spirit directed me to a shop that fit my pocket, He knew what I could afford. That is just the same way He will help you when you decide to let go of whatever it may be.

Letting go does not take place easily, it will cost you something. Be it, your time, reputation, friends, family etc. But it won’t cost you anything the Lord cannot replenish.

I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten- the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and locusts swarm- my great army that I sent among you. You will have plenty to eat, until you are full and you will praise the name of the Lord your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be ashamed. Joel 2 v 25-26 [NIV]

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10 v 10 [NIV]

Letting go may require asking for help from other Spirit-filled believers..

Without counsel, plans go awry, but in the multitude of counselors they are established. Proverbs 15 v 22 [NKJV]

let go2

Pardon the poor picture quality.

As the Holy Spirit leads you, if need be, ask for help from true believers of integrity, that can help you. Not judge you or tell tales [loose lips]. Let pride die.

This post is a stone killing numerous birds. I believe every reader will be able to identify in one way or another. I also believe that the Holy Spirit will minister to every heart in every area that requires letting go.

When the Holy Spirit shines the light on that area, the first step before any of those mentioned above is to repent…..

If we admit our sins- make a clean breast of them- He won’t let us down; He’ll be true to himself. He’ll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing. 1 John 2 v 9 [MSG]

You cannot experience total peace and joy in disobedience.

Let the healing/building process begin.

Stay in tune with the comforter.


P.S: When you struggled with letting go, how did you overcome? Encourage us..

Please be aware that from next week, I will putting up one post per week. My schedule is changing and more of my time will be required as such. This will continue till mid-May. Thanks for your understanding.

Also, please remember me in your prayers. Thank you!


“So leave the corruption and compromise; leave it for good”, says God. 2 Cor 6 v 19 [MSG]

Missed my last post?

Missed the last HELP! Post?

You’ll love these too: Rhema 1 and Rhema 2

Have any questions/suggestions:

Princess Okechukwu!


6 thoughts on “HELP! I Can’t Let Go……

  1. As I read this, it brought to mind a particular lesson on “prompt obedience”. It’s a study I intended to much can I share here?
    But all in all, I personally want to get to that point where God says, let go or drop this, I do it immediately.
    We wrestle too much with God’s Spirit, our flesh speak too loudly.
    But I love how you said “God can replenish anything He asks us to drop” and even more than we let go of, He will give.
    But first, we’ve gotta let go.

    I pray to get to the point where it doesn’t take me weeks to let go, but immediately! Just like Abraham was always eager to obey God.
    Struggling does me(us) no good moreso cuz letting go is for our good ultimately.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This was me a couple of years ago. I struggled so much with letting go of a relationship that God wasn’t pleased with. In the end, I am happy I think. What I learnt is that when God tells us to let go of something, He actually gives us enough grace to let go, we just have to tap into that grace.

    Thanks for sharing. It is a great post. God bless you.


Kindly say it...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s