Month: January 2014

Who has the ‘liberty’ to ‘freedom’??

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I am not ignorant of the developments taking place around the world, I try to keep up. From the new bill that was recently signed by President Goodluck Jonathan to the winner of the Ballon d’Or winner, Cristiano Ronaldo. Ehen! that guy is good oh. How do I know that? Well, since I was lil’ girl, his name was the first I heard about when it came to footie [international], and till today, I am still hearing about him. Then I did small amebo research, and realised his number is 7, I was born on the 7th; that just sealed the deal. Ride on CR7!!! #Backtothematter#
     

However, there’s another ‘eye-catching’ news that has caught my eyes- Francois Hollande’s affair.

Francois Hollande is the current president of France, he has been the president since May 2012. Recently, a tabloid Closer printed a seven-page article on his affair with Juliet Gayet, an actress. This is really ‘rocking his boat’ at the moment. There have been people who have said “it is his private life and it’s nobody’s business” and trust there are other people who feel otherwise.”He’s a president for crying out loud, he should have known better” and all sorts. In the news two nights ago, a news reporter said that this act has affected his credibility, thereby loosing the trust of his people gradually. His approval rating has drastically dropped from the time he was elected to this present moment, I won’t say as a result of the affair though; and the French economy is weak with persistent high rates of unemployment. The list is almost inexhaustive!

On a lighter note…..lol

The president has only given remarks like-‘private matters should be dealt with privately’, ‘it is neither the time nor place to answer questions about his personal life’. Even when being pressurized by journalist yesterday in a news conference, he still kept schtum, maybe not schtum, but he definitely did not give the journalists what they wanted.

Basically, I am aware of ‘the right to privacy’, the right people in the spotlight, wish they could have absolutely. Unfortunately, they can’t, no matter how hard they try. I am also aware that there are certain standards/expectations that are attached to certain positions. But here’s the thing- why is it that when a celebrity/Doctor/Pastor/CEO/Senator/MP/Judge/House of Assembly member gets involved in something that is against the moral/societal values, eyebrows are raised, we hear statements like’he/she should not have done that’, ‘that’s just wrong’? But when an individual (not in the spotlight) ventures into such, no one bats an eyelid, we here the statements like-‘it is nobody’s business’?

Do not get me wrong, I am not justifying the actions of the President, neither am I saying: ‘Mr President, you should have known better’. I just guess there are certain people who are wondering why this disparity exists!
Yesterday, I read about a Pastor who was preaching in a Lagos bus. He said all sorts: ‘devil invented make up’, weave-on is from the marine world’, if you have pre-marital sex, you’ll burn in hell’…….Later, while he was laying hands and praying for people in the bus, two durex condoms fell out from his bible. The angry men who were feeling guilty due to his preaching, pounced on him. Then he started screaming: “I also preach safe sex, safe sex is good”……

In the above scenario, you might say that the reaction of the men is quite understandable considering how he [the pastor] voiced out his opinion and belief. In other words, he was not practicing what he was preaching.

But in a situation where a person has not preached, he/she just occupies a ‘spotlight position’, do you think a ‘misconduct’ should ruin the credibility of the person in the position? If the function of the position is being executed very well, will people still take notice of the misconduct(s)/ should people take notice of the the misconduct? Over to you!

Behind closed doors…….

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Oh yeah! it’s been ages, I know. A massive ten days. Whew! I can hear you ask ‘where have you been?’ ‘what’s been happening?’, both in your mind and in deeds (checking up for updates on the blog). Your questions will be answered-‘exclusive gist’ of the day.

So how have you been? How’s the new year going for you? Are you meeting your targets for the day/month/year? I have missed doing this, you know. Every second, every minute, every hour, every day that I did not put up a post, I thought of you, Yes! You. So I tender my unreserved apology for not being around. Forgive oh! And please tell ‘them’ to come back, cos I am back to do the thing!

Why was I away? *singing this is my confession to you*Sometime last month, I was given course works (assignments) 3 of them. You ask: what’s the biggie? Well! it’s no biggie to anyone else but me. I hate course works, I cringe at the sound of the letter ‘C’ of the word. I silently panic at the moment a lecturer says ‘the question for the —— coursework is out’. I don’t know why I hate it but that’s the story of my life since I left Secondary (High) school. Give me exams any day, and you’ve just made a girl happy. But as life is, you cannot get what you want at all times. Having the three course works was not the challenge (yet), it just happened that the festivity was on, I was over-the-moon and all. On a normal day, that wouldn’t have been an issue; it was just that every day I read the question for one of the course works, I had no understanding at all. It was very discouraging having to look at a directionless question, really! The discouragement veered into procrastination, which affected the other two.


To cut the long story short, with tears and sleepless nights, I have finished the course works on time, with my all in them. At this point, I will like to salute those that do ‘lastminute.com’ with assignments, you guys are powerful. This is surely my one and only last experience [I will make sure of that]

From this my short story, big lessons have been birth. I am a person who believes in new day resolutions. I also respect people that do new year resolution, whatever rocks your boat! As the year 2014 has begun with the course work experience, this is my take for the year.

Be mindful of what your feelings generate. I was discouraged because of ‘a directionless question’ that I did not even take note of the other two questions that I could have done easily (not so easily, it’s still coursework, remember) while still brainstorming and researching for the other one. This led to time wasting, procrastination and lots of stress in juggling the three at the same time. This year, there may be something that is not coming through as you expect, don’t dwell on it or build negative energy while waiting, focus on the things that are working, while on it; trust me, it (they) will come around. Time reveals all, be patient!

The time to do anything is always now. Because I know how course works make me feel, I usually start immediately the question is out. But this time, apart from the fact that I had a ‘heady’ question, I became complacent because of how I did the previous course work-I started on time and confidently did a good job on it, so I felt I could fold my hands this time, as I was still revelling in the moments of the past. That’s the thing with human beings at times (me inclusive, I am human). 
The truth is ‘you never arrive’, there’s always something to improve, do differently and achieve. You remember what our brother, Paul said in Philippians 3:13-14: I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. I am sure when Paul wrote that letter he must have achieved a lot, won souls, people must have been praising him; telling him to cool down. But here is the thing-in as much as success is relative, the primary determiner of success is God, not you or your friends or your frienemies. 

This year make conscious steps to know God for yourself to know when he is saying: go, stop, do it gently, don’t venture into that….because that was what Paul did, even when it looked as if he ‘had arrived’ in the eyes of men, he knew there was still more to do. So maybe last year, you got promoted, don’t relent on your productivity. You may have won a thousand souls, there are still more souls in need of the word of God. Or like me, you may have done so well in your previous coursework; still keep up, don’t procrastinate. 

So Happy new year once again! Dare to be the best God has called you to be this year, set realistic goals and always keep moving! As for me, the new year has started off with lessons, and I’m excited to use them WELL and learn from them. What lessons are you learning/have you learnt in the early days of year 2014?

I am back and not going anywhere. Spread the word! #nextpostonwednesday#

When does Tradition cross the line?

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Happy New Year! It’s a new year and everyone has got different expectations for the year 2014. I will like to appreciate you for every second and minute you’ve spent on this blog, it means a lot and words cannot express my depth of gratitude. This year, I’ve decided to make your every moment worthwhile.

While in the spirit of the contentment of seeing the new year, I just thought to myself; what will I be doing differently on ‘Precious Thoughts’?……I will be focusing on Quality rather than Quantity, in essence, I hope to put up posts that have contents of peculiar standards. Therefore, I am not into how many posts have I put up in a week but into what kind of post is on the blog. I’ve realised that Quality attracts quantity, hopefully before mid-year; we will see the evidence.

So starting off is a matter that has gotten my attention in the past two weeks and has been fueled by some movies and certain happenings in present time.

Let’s talk about Tradition. According to the Oxford Dictionary, Tradition is ‘the transmission of customs or beliefs from generation to generation; or the fact of being passed on in this way’. I’m a Nigerian, so let’s talk on one Nigerian stuff. There is this significant aspect of tradition practiced in some parts of Nigeria, that has grasped my attention.

Bride Price- the amount of money or property or wealth paid by the groom or his family to the parents of a woman upon the marriage of their daughter to the groom. The tradition of bride price is practiced differently all around the world, but permit me to say that some parts of Nigeria are abusing it, with a capital A.

Lol! Who sees this happening?

I’m aware of the lists that is given to the groom and his family to make provision of all mentioned items before the marriage can take place. Most times, this lists are absolutely ridiculous. Don’t misunderstand me here, I don’t hate the ‘bride price’ custom, what I hate is the greed of man hiding under the umbrella of ‘it is our tradition’. I appreciate the fact that a lot of hard work and training has been invested into the ladies and all, but do we think of the consequences of this ‘Women as commodities’ practice?

I’ve heard of a man who abused his wife at the slightest occurrence of a mistake, and always made reference to the fact that ‘with the bride price he had paid, he should not get anything below standard from her’; in a case as this-the man has been abused by his in-laws while he passes it on to his wife. On a lighter note, I’ve heard of men say they will go to Dominican Republic to marry a wife as they are free. lol [I’m not sure how true that is].

But my question is: do you feel there’s a time when tradition ‘crosses the line’? at what point does it cross the line? do you have or know of any personal experience of Bride Price ‘saga’ or other traditions that are being practiced that you feel is crossing the line?

How do we make a balance? are you for the ‘bring whatever you have'[not 5naira though.lol]? or do you think bride price should be fixed?

Amazingly, the people who make these lists may not necessarily be your Parents. It may be a ‘Grandfather’s uncle’s kinsmen’. Personally, I think the authority to generate such list should not be given to anyone who has not made any impact/contribution to the growth/success of the bride. You may think that’s harsh, tough! Desperate times call for desperate measures.

So what’s your take?